BRIAN: Do you want me to fix you something for lunch?
ME: Sure! I don’t know…um…maybe just a turkey sandwich?
BRIAN: Okay. Coming right up!
ME: Wait, do you know how I like it?
BRIAN: I mean…it’s just a turkey sandwich, right?
ME: Just a turkey sandwich?!?!? No. Absolutely not. Here’s how I do it: I get the organic, whole grain bread out of the fridge and put it in the microwave for five seconds. Twice.
BRIAN: Can’t I just do it for 10 seconds?
ME: No. Because then it will cook too quickly. Then I put a “good bit” of mayo on one side and a “good bit” of yellow mustard on the other. Then, I add two pieces of Swiss cheese—overlapping in the center, naturally. Then 4 pieces of turkey, also overlapping. Then—and this is important—between the turkey and the cheese, I put two pieces of red leaf lettuce. With the ribs removed. But they have to be adequately washed and dried first.
BRIAN: Okay…so…I put a little bit of mayo…?
ME: Forget it. I’ll do it myself.
BRIAN: NO! I can do this.
ME: I want a GOOD BIT of mayo and a GOOD BIT of mustard. On separate pieces of pre-softened, organic, whole grain bread.
BRIAN: Forget it. Just do it yourself.
Hmmmmmm. And I wonder where you got that from. Let’s just say I can feel Brian’s pain. 😉
@GMan Yeah, yeah. But you know there is such thing as being TOO low-maintenance. I bet mom could serve you a Spam and dirt smoothie, and you’d gobble it up like it’s gourmet. I think it’s perfectly okay to be picky with what you eat. 🙂
“I’ll have the chef salad please, with the oil and vinegar on the side and the apple pie a la mode. But I don’t want the ice cream on top, I want it on the side, and I’d like strawberry instead of vanilla if you have it, if not then no ice cream, just whipped cream, but only if it’s real, if its out the can then nothing.”
Yes but do you have to have the mayo on the meat side and the mustard on the cheese side. And throw a spastic fit if not? Because that’s my husband… The sandwich girls at the local deli shutter when he comes in!
Cheri, I don’t see anything wrong with that. Nothing at all. 😉
I totally feel your pain! A pb and j is not just done any old way. Fresh, soft bread and not the heels. A ‘good deal’ of peanut butter. Then the jelly goes on the. Same. Side. Not the other slice of bread. Gobs of jelly on top of the pb, not spread with a knife and definitely not spread thin over all the pb. My hubby thinks I’m crazy but it does taste better that way! 😉
yep