On August 16, 2012, I sat down at the computer in our basement and began to type. I was in the throes of “single” parenthood while Brian was away on military business, and it seems I was starting to feel the pressure:
“I would venture to say that Martha Stewart’s sentence vacation in a federal prison was more like a Caribbean holiday compared to the trenches of motherhood.”
Alllllllllrighty then.
But then it got worse…
“You’re not going to learn how to make ‘Keep Calm and Love Yourself’ signs out of reclaimed wood on this site. Because signs that tell me to keep calm just annoy the crap out of me. Calm is what happens BEFORE you have children. And never again after that.”
[Maybe Katy DOES need some “keep calm” paraphernalia around her house.]
Admittedly, that was a tough week.
Followed by a tough few months.
Followed by the most horrible experiences of my life: a crumbling marriage and the loss of a baby.
Followed by the undeserved grace and mercy of a sovereign God.
Followed by healing and forgiveness.
Followed by joy and laughter.
Followed by moonbeams and marshmallows and unicorns.
[I never understand Katy when she starts to talk about unicorns. Aren’t they extinct?]
I’m amazed when I look through the archives of this blog and see how our lives have changed since August 16, 2012. Do you see that sad, solitary post in the month of December? And that empty spot where January posts should be?
That is when I honestly believed that the emotional pain I felt might physically kill me. I never knew pain like that could exist. I finally understood the expression, “my heart aches.”
Hopelessness, isolation and despair set in, and I was certain that I would never experience joy like I once had—before sin and death devoured my life as I knew it and left me there trying—failing!—to glue it all back together again.
The word “depression” doesn’t adequately describe where I was in January.
But God didn’t leave me there. He didn’t leave Brian there. And he didn’t leave our marriage there!
Am I happy today? Mostly. I mean, my coffee is kinda cold right now, my kids are whining, I stink at potty training, and I think I’m getting carpal tunnel.
But am I joyful? Fully. Because I have the kind of joy that doesn’t depend on my circumstances. And miraculously. Because it doesn’t come from anything I mustered up or found in myself.
[Um…isn’t this the same blogger who just wrote about personal lubricant a few days ago? How in the world did I just get theologically flash mobbed?]
Welcome, new readers! My name is Katy, and I’ll be your tour guide through 50 Shades of Crazy.
Y’all, I totally just came up with that. Has it already been taken? I sure hope not. I never read the other one, but I would TOTALLY read something called 50 Shades of Crazy.
Could y’all stand me another 60 or 70 years? I sure hope so.
And on that topic, I want to host a paper-related giveaway since paper is the traditional gift to give on a 1-year anniversary. Y’all are in serious luck if I make it to 60 years. Diamonds, baby!
Today, though, I’m giving away 12 copies of Dr. Tedd Tripp’s book, Shepherding a Child’s Heart. I emailed Dr. Trip last week to ask if he would send some copies for my 1st Blogiversary, and he kindly agreed! I just about peed my pants.
[This is the most professional giveaway I’ve ever seen. Seriously, someone get this girl her own show.]
One comment per person, please. I’ll select 12 random folks to win this excellent book. Comments will close on Sunday night, and I’ll announce the winners on Monday!
Okay, one final thing, and I promise I’ll let you get out of here before Christmas…
[Seriously, we might make it to the 60th anniversary on this ONE POST!]
Friends…thank you. Thank you for reading this crazy blog. Thank you for the time you take to share your lives with me. Thank you for praying for me, encouraging me and walking with me through this past year. I wish I could give every single one of you a book—no, I wish I could give you all diamonds!
Someone please call Oprah. We have to make this happen.
Love y’all and thank you for celebrating this blogiversary with me!
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[…] this past year! God may not allow me to make it another 60 years, and finances may not allow me to hand out diamonds, but I do want to say that you are all precious gems to […]
Congrats on your 1 year anniversary! I love reading your blogs! You are one talented and funny writer! Wish you all the best in the years to come (all 60 of them ;-)!
Congrats on a year!!! I love reading your blog because it always makes me feel like I am having a conversation with you, albeit a one sided conversation….but anyway… Hugs and love to you and Brian! One of these days I hope I can see you IN PERSON again!
Love reading every word you write. xoxox
@Kelley Statham Funny, Kelley…Brian says he feels like he has one-sided conversations with me all the time. Huh. 😉
Absolutely encouraging! Love your honesty!
I love your blog and it’s completely made me nod my head like yes someone gets this parenting thing like I do 🙂 thank you Katy! -Allyson
Congrats on 1 year! I just found you recently, so I don’t know you’re whole story, but I think it’s great you’re back in a good place. I’ve been in the bad one and know its not fun!
Ugh, your, I hate those mistakes!!
Yeah, Oprah would have the diamonds. And we’d all get a new car and our own island. Happy blogiversary! Wishing you Oprah-style success 🙂
I’m sorry last year was so hard. Last year was a really rough one for me too, but this year God swooped me up like a baby-chick and I feel so much better. I’m really glad you’re here, sharing, and hit your first blogiversary!! Congrats!!
Congratulations!!!
CONGRATULATIONS on your One Year Anniversary! Your posts are very funny — and your videos are giggle-inducing too!
HOLLLAAAAA on the 1-year! You rule it. And I obviously having some catching up to do. Should I just go ahead and sew tissue paper to my lower eyelids?
So cute you are! And I must say… if you aren’t potty trained at 32, just give up now. I know there are “adult incontinence pads” out there for you.
@Bev WeidnerBEV!!!! You’ve had a big year yourself, girl. Congrats! (PS – Y’all this is THE Bev Weidner here. She has the most HILARIOUS and scrumptious-looking food blog: http://bevcooks.com/)
Congrats on one year!
DarcyPerdu1 THANK YOU, Darcy, for all the encouragements and comments! You’ve been a HUGE support. xx
Jill KemererThank you, Jill! And I’m sorry to hear that your year has been rough as well. But isn’t it amazing how God chooses to grow us and make us more Christlike through those times? Soli Deo gloria!
Kristiwimb Welcome and thanks for the comment! You haven’t missed much as far as details of our difficult year, but we do plan to share more as God leads. Because, as you mentioned, we all suffer and struggle. And I believe it could be a great encouragement to others. Anyhow, thanks again for stopping by, and don’t worry about the typo. Happens to the best of ’em. I’m not the best, but I’m sure it happens to them too. 😉
JuliaJetSkiI love that I came up with my own nickname for you. Makes my day. 🙂 Here’s a link in case anyone is curious to know more about Julia Jet-Ski: http://katyinacorner.com/puppetears-episode-1/
shanna_bennett Hahahaha! Shanna, I thought the same thing when I read this post back to myself. I thought, “I wonder if people will think that I’m not potty trained myself. Naaaaaah. No one will think that.” Thanks for proving me wrong. 🙂
asgcugirl THANK YOU!
Cmomma0920 Don’t we all need that in life? There are several bloggers who do that for me as well. I just laugh because I know EXACTLY what they mean. This is one of the biggest compliments you could give me as a blogger. Thank you for the encouragement!
mrstopherac Thank you so much! I get the honesty honestly. I learned at a very early age not to ask my mom what she thinks of my new hairdo. Unless I want to get my feelings hurt. (Can’t blame her, though. Perms aren’t really great on me.)
Congrats! On SO many levels congrats! God is so good and thank you for sharing it. I love your blog and your sense of humor! I would totally read 50 Shades of Crazy. Get writing! 🙂
From the book “Kisses from Katie”: “Remember, God will never give you more than you can handle.” People repeat this frequently; I heard it when I was growing up and I hear it now. It is meant to be a source of encouragement, and it would be if I believed it were true. But I don’t. I believe that God totally, absolutely, intentionally gives us more than we can handle. Because this is when we surrender to him and he takes over, proving himself by doing the impossible in our lives. I have learned to accept it, even ask for it, this ‘more than I can handle.’ Because in these times, God shows himself victorious. He reminds me that all of this life requires more of him and less of me. God does give us more than we can handle. Not maliciously, but intentionally, in love, that his glory may be displayed, that we may have no doubt of who is in control, that people may see his grace and faithfulness shining through out lives.
Annnnnd… on another note…
Happy 1 year anniversary!! Thanks for all that you do, I love reading about your life as we all stumble around through life and this “thing” that we call parenting. Thanks for the laughs, I love that you keep it real. 🙂
LisaMom0609 THANK YOU so much for reading and for the encouragement!
Congrats on 1 year! I love reading your blog because you are so relatable (It’s possible that’s not a real word) and hilarious. I have a 4 year old, 2 and a half year old, and 1 year old, so I completely get your kid stories! I love them to pieces, but my word, they have changed my whole life LOL.
@Julie WOW. That’s an incredible quote! And oh so true. Thank you for sharing it. And thank you for reading and your encouragement! It means so much to us.
@Karmen You’ve been here with me for a while, Karmen! Thank you for all your comments. For interacting. For the encouragement. My face lights up every time I see a familiar face and name!
@Brooke Relatable is TOTALLY a real word, but my comment system is too dumb to recognize it. 🙂 Okay, so let me get this straight…you have a 4-, 2- and 1-year-old? I bet you have some stories to tell! Thanks for reading and for commenting, Brooke!
Congratulations on 1 year. I love your stories, especially when they pertain to “MY PRECIOUS” grandchildren. Keep ’em coming!!
Katy’s Mama YOU DID IT! You conquered the comment system! I know you hate it, and I was going to change it. But I just love to hear you fuss about it every time you want to comment. 😉 Kidding, mama. We’re working on it… Thank you for reading and always giving your honest opinion. Even when your honest opinion is, “I just didn’t think it was that funny.” You’re the reason I’ve never embarrassed myself on American Idol. 🙂
ShanaSpears Thank you, Shana, and I’m glad I was able to help in some way. It’s humbling to realize that God can use my trials to encourage others. You’ve been a huge supporter from the get-go, and I truly appreciate your interaction!
Congrats on the 1 year!!! I would swear that I’ve been reading you longer than that … and that sounds WEIRD. Lol. You are hilarious and an inspiration to read! Here’s to 60 more :))
Happy 1 Year Blogiversary! Please don’t stop blogging… Like Ever ☺
Congrats on one year of blogging! Your blog inspires me and makes me laugh. I get so excited when a new post appears in my inbox! Keep it up!!
*Nicole Roberts
Congrats on the first year! And Katy, thank YOU. Thank you for sharing with us the things you can’t talk about. We don’t need details to care and to pray for you. I doubt there’s a single person who reads your blog regularly, who doesn’t love you even tho’ we’ve never met and probably won’t! I know I do….I pray for you and I love ya! So keep up the good work and God willing, I’ll be around when the diamonds are passed out! Dona
You thank us, but, sincerely, THANK YOU!! It is so fun to read someone else’s struggles with motherhood. You make me laugh and cry, and reassure me that on the really rough days that I can do this.
I have loved reading and following in your journey–good and bad. We pray for you, laugh with you, and rejoice with you! Plus, you make me not feel as crazy about bringing things to Starbucks to personalize my order.
Hey, beautiful lady. It really is amazing what can happen in 12 short months. Your December post was actually the first one I stumbled onto, and you had some major tears shed for you on that one. I’ve been in that black hole before, and it took a long time to allow myself to heal. On the flip side, you had me in tears with the Trojan article and the long balls. Holy cow, every one needs a Katy in their lives!
@Monica K That doesn’t sound weird at all. I feel like I’ve been blogging longer than that. 🙂 Except I had two other blogs, but that’s not what I mean. Thanks for reading, and I hope I make it to 60 for reals. Except I had better discover a diamond mine before then.
MaryStephens That’s my goal, Mary! God willing, I’ll keep on keeping on. Thanks for reading!
@Nicole Awwww…THANKS, Nicole! I feel that way every time I get a comment. I may or may not be the obsessive type who checks my email every 15 seconds. Maybe. Probably not. ‘Cause that would be pathetic. Disregard.
imklvr Dona, you’re one of my favorite regulars I have to say. 🙂 You’re always here with an encouraging word. Thank you for making this SO MUCH FUN. xx
CarolynTreeMom THAT is exactly why I started this blog!!! Because I knew there had to be more out there than the “perfect mom” image I kept seeing everywhere. Sure, I love to share the cute/funny/great stories about my kids, but I think people identify more with the challenges of motherhood. At least, I do! Thanks for the comment(s), and I hope to see you ’round here for the next 60 years…when I’ll be talking about adult diapers and dentures. 🙂
Stephanie W You and I should totally walk into a Starbucks together and BLOW THEIR MINDS. They wouldn’t even know what happened. And we’d be all, “That’s right S’bucks. We just dropped a high-maintenance bomb on y’all. Fo’ realzzzz.” I don’t know why the salty language is necessary. I just imagined it that way in my mind. We can totally go for an English dialect if you’re more comfortable with that. Just let me know.
kacyasherbishop1981Okay, I have to put up a link for the “long balls” in case anyone is reading this and hasn’t read that post: http://katyinacorner.com/how-to-traumatize-your-friends-kid/
Just didn’t want anyone to misunderstand. 🙂 Okay, I have to say that one of my favorite things about this blog has been they way that is has reconnected me with “old” friends. I’m so grateful that you have kept in touch with me here! Thank you for your friendship (since middle school, right?), and let’s continue to stay in touch! xx
I started reading your blog since your guest post on Modern Mom, and I’ve been reading you ever since. I’ll say thank you for sharing your journey in motherhood, and sharing such personal things, not only good, but also the bad ones. I feel like your blog is the most honest I’ve read on the web. Is not one of those ” I’ll fix my entire house and then I’ll buy another one to remodel as well” kind of blog, but one that most of us can relate to. Every time I talk to my husband about things I read here, he’s like ” is that a friend of yours or ….??” and then I feel like a total idiot coz I’m like ” um.. well .. kind of, I mean I feel like we are, but we are not, per se”
So thank you for being honest, funny and real. Happy Blogiversary!!
Happy Blogiversary or however you spell it.
Congratulations on your milestone of blogging for a year! You are a true inspiration to all the moms out there and have a way of captivating your readers with honesty, realness and humor!
katyinacorner Stephanie W Yes!! What a great idea!! When you are back in GA we can!!!
Thanks for making me laugh and for helping me feel like I’m not crazy! Looking forward to reading your blog for years to come!
Katy, I just recently started visiting your blog after a guest post you did at My Life & Kids. After reading THIS post, I’m determined to go back through the archives and get caught up with everything. Wait, does that sound stalker-ish? Doesn’t everyone do that when they find a new blog they like? Just me? Ok, well forget I said that then.
Anyway, totally stoked to enter the giveaway and Happy Anniversary!
Thank you for your wonderful blog! I look forward to the days I can read it to start my day off with youe humor. Your posts are so real and relatable. Than k you for your dedication to this blog.
Oh Katy, I just adore you. 🙂 Happy one year of blogging! And thanks for opening your heart to us. You have (truly) made me feel a little less alone in the ups and downs of marriage and motherhood.
@Breanna
And thank YOU for reading and encouraging me, Breanna! It’s a huge
blessing to gain such encouragement from my readers, and I thank you for
taking the time to do that. xx
HeatherMcDHi
Heather! That’s for visiting from Anna’s beautiful blog. Things are
slightly less tidy over here, as you can tell. 🙂 I don’t think it’s
stalker-ish AT ALL for you to go back and read. I have on several
occasions found a blogger I’m curious about and read—in a single
sitting—nearly everything they had published. And some of those blogs
were 10 years old! So, you caught me at a good time. 🙂
@Jaimie1277
And I look forward to having you here, Jaimie! Comments like yours help
me feel like I’M not crazy, so it’s mutually beneficial. Hopefully,
together, we’ll save lots of money in therapy down the road. 🙂
@sopia25 Well, I went and wrote a thank you comment to you and then accidentally deleted it. Super professional. 🙂 What I said—if I can recall—is that those exact three words (real, honest, humorous) are EXACTLY what I hope to convey here. Thank you for your encouragement!
@Carisa
I wasn’t sure how to spell it either, Carisa. So, I just made it up.
That’s what I love about having my own blog. I just invent words if they
don’t exist. And, if you listen closely you can hear my high school
English teacher crying.
@Elissa
R I do that all the time to Brian! I call everyone by their blog name,
and he gets really confused who all these other friends of mine really
are. And THANK YOU for such wonderful compliments!
@Amanda, it warms my heart to hear you say that! Because I first created this blog as a way to reach out to other moms who, like me, didn’t have a “Pinterest-perfect” life and marriage. I’m so thankful that I can walk beside and encourage other wives and mothers like you. Thank you for your kind words and for taking the time to read and engage with me!
You crack me up. I love reading your blog because it’s so real and honest (and makes me feel like I’m not the only one who isn’t perfect). Not that I don’t think you are perfect or anything. I just can relate to the un-perfectness. Wait, I’m digging myself into a hole here…Thanks for sharing your life with all of us.
Just found your blog through My Life and Kids blog. Love it!! Adding you to my bookmarks! Thanks for the chance!!
Did you plan your blog to coincide with Patrick Swazye b-day or is that just a weird cowinkydink?
Thank you for being you! Xoxoxo
I had no idea! But that’s a pretty crazy cowinkydink. 🙂
Pretty cool! 😀
You da bomb, baby! Thanks for making me smile over and over again.
Screw potty training!
I absolutely love your blog and I get so excited to get the email letting me know a new one is ready. Thank you for making my family think I have totally lost it when I burst out in laughter while reading. And for causing my husband to have to wait patiently while I try to get my giggles under control because I HAVE to read your blogs to him. Congrats on your first year! 🙂
I l-l-l-l-l-l-lurve your blog!! Thanks for being so candid and open, hilarious and real, raw and revealing. We could all use a little more transparency in our days. And I can *totally* hear you shouting, “YOU get a book! YOU get a book! YOU get a book! YOU get a book!”
@LisaD Helloooooooo down there, Lisa! Way down deep in your deep, deep hole! You’re not alone. Not at all. I’m down here in the not-so-perfect trenches with you. 😉
Emily Simmons WELCOME, Emily! Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. So glad to have you over from Anna’s place. Isn’t she awesome? She’s even more adorable in person. Love that girl. Seriously, I would do an Anna commercial if she’d let me. 🙂
angie76 Awww. 😉 Thanks!
maggie b Hahaha! Your comment made me and Brian laugh out loud. Yes, potty training is the pits. Check out tomorrow’s post if you want to see how much I hate it. (Spoiler alert!)
ChristyBell518THANK YOU, Christy! I love it when wives force their husbands to listen to me. Makes my day. Ha! I do the same thing to Brian, too. I sat at my computer last week and read him nearly all of the captions on the “My Imaginary Well-Dressed Toddler Daughter” Pinterest board (http://pinterest.com/tiffanywbwg/my-imaginary-well-dressed-toddler-daughter/). I was CRYING. He smirked once or twice. 🙂
DeannaMurphy Hahahaha! I just laughed so hard at your comment I scared Brian. He said, “Why do you have to burst out like that? It’s terrifying!” Because I envisioned me skipping around a studio throwing free stuff to people—Oprah style! I love that. Deanna, you get a front row seat if that ever happens. Please just remind me of this conversation because my memory is crap. 🙂
you’re awesome!
extinct unicorns…laughing so hard out loud!!! HAHAHA!!!!!