I think our 2-year-old has been watching horror movies without our knowledge.
(How? Isn’t he supervised?)
Well, you know how kids will pick up an iPad or iPhone and flip over to the Netflix app, and it’s about 45 minutes before you realize what they’re watching?
No…no. I don’t either.
Actually, my husband and I spend our evenings pre-screening PBS shows to ensure the material is appropriate for our children’s impressionable minds. And then after that, we take the rainwater we collect and our compost pile out to the vegetable garden to do a bit of maintenance. Then we come back inside with some homegrown goodies, wash them with all-natural vegetable wash, and chow down on some raw foods.
Nom, nom, nom.
After that we sit and fold cloth diapers while we take turns reading aloud “Animal, Vegetable, Miracle” to each other before changing into our hemp pajamas and retiring for the night under our recycled, bamboo sheets.
Anyhow, let’s talk about the apparent lack of parental monitoring that has occurred here.
Our son started this horrifying habit a few weeks ago. It’s one I can only imagine he learned from “The Shining” or “Teen Wolf” — which, granted, wasn’t so scary — or “Paranormal Activity” or some other film where the children are…horrifying.
Here’s the scenario:
In his most innocent whisper, JJ will lean over to one of us and say, “The moon is shining bright.”
Granted, I just typed that line and read it aloud to myself and it didn’t seem so scary.
But I assure you it is HORRIFYING when you’re driving down the road in the middle of the day, you catch a glimpse of your toddler boy staring at you in the rearview mirror, and he opens his eyes wide and whispers, “The moon is shining bright.”
Holy cow, I just got chill bumps when I typed that!
And when we ask him what it means, he just acts all nonchalant like he didn’t even say it.
He’s all,
The moon is shining bright.
And we’re all,
Aaaahhhh! What?!?!? Why did you say that?
And he’s all,
Hey, Lightning McQueen!
I don’t know what has happened over here. Either he has seen a horror film without my knowledge or this kid has a TWISTED sense of humor.
Either way, JJ will never again have a video monitor in his room because I think he’s just sinister enough to have some real fun messing with us.
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Hilarious! Love your writing and videos. Keep it up!
Thanks so much Karmen! You know, I LOVE the name of your blog, “Chairs from the Curb.” My mom and I frequently pick up other peoples’ “trash” and turn them into…well, stuff we’ll eventually throw away one day too. But they’re our treasures for a time. Thanks for the visit!
This one is so awesome! I would be totally creeped out too, Ha!
My daughter has a freakish ability to walk almost silently, so sometimes you turn around and she is right behind you…scares the crap out of me! I have told her if she doesn’t start making noise when she walks we are going to make her wear a bell around her neck…okay, I might not follow through on that one, but it is darn creepy!
Your blog posts and videos are hilarious! Thanks for sharing them!
I don’t know, Katy…wouldn’t the bell be kind of freaky too?!? Because if you try to run away from her, that bell is just going to haunt you the whole time! Wow. I think we have a horror movie plot right there. Thanks so much for visiting and for the kind words!