You know what is a humbling experience for a 31-year-old man with a wife and two kids?
That knot in the pit of his stomach as he speeds by a cop on a rural, country route. Only to check the rear-view mirror and see him pull a Dukes of Hazzard move in the middle of the road—with flashing, blue lights and siren blazing.
…The frustration he feels with himself as he begrudgingly hands over a sir sandwich in exchange for that infamous, yellow slip of paper. (“Sir. Thank you, sir. May I have another, sir?”)
…And to see his charge written on carbon paper in plain pencil: “Defendant exceeded the posted speed limit.”
…In a minivan.
…On the way to church.
…With his children in the back seat.
…Ironically, watching a movie about race cars.
…And his patient, quiet wife by his side. Holding the defendant’s hand—and her tongue—because she can sense his frustration. And she knows it is best not to speak in those moments.
(One of these things does not belong.)
Okay, so I was mildly irritated that Brian—for the second time IN A WEEK—was pulled over for exceeding the speed limit by roughly 10 miles per hour in both instances. The first time was on our way home from Memorial Day in Indiana. But the second time was yesterday on the way to church.
I repeat, ON THE WAY TO CHURCH.
This situation, my friends, was a test of character for both of us. But it was a particularly humbling experience for Brian for several reasons:
1) He instinctively said, “Yes, sir” to the officer several times before he actually made eye contact and realized this guy couldn’t have been a day over 14. I mean absolutely NO disrespect, but I’ve seen kids working at lemonade stands who looked older.
We both wondered if we ought to ask to see HIS driver’s license.
2) As soon as we pulled back onto the road after our little “pit stop,” JJ called out from the back seat, “Daddy, we’re going reeeeeeeeeeally FAST!”
(Note to self: Add that little gem to our parenting book entitled, “Do As I Say….”)
3) Brian was blessed enough to receive a mere warning last Monday when he was pulled over, and his exact words were (I kid you not), “I’m done speeding. It’s just not worth it.”
(*Ahem*)
4) Our sermon at church this Sunday was about spending our money wisely.
(*A-HEM*)
Needless to say I didn’t need to have the typical “I told you so” conversation with Brian since there was plenty of conviction coming at him from other places.
But I did it anyway.
“Honey, you know the cruise control works on this car, right?”
“Also, I’ve told you in the past that my speedometer reads 2 mph slower than it actually is.”
“It wouldn’t be so annoying if this hadn’t just happened last Monday!”
“Weeeeeeeeell, at least you didn’t get two tickets in the SAME DAY by the SAME COP like you did in college.”
After I had my little rant, and we continued the drive to church (going 10 miles under the speed limit in the fast lane), I felt pretty bad about my reaction. What right did I have to get on my church-going soap box? Because I have more than paid my fair share of “stupid taxes” (as Dave Ramsey would say), and I can’t recall a single time that Brian has given me an “I told you so” reaction. Not once.
Not the time I hit my mom’s car when it was parked directly behind me.
Or the other time I hit my mom’s car when it was parked directly behind me.
Or the time I signed us up for that network marketing thing.
Or the other time I signed us up for a different network marketing thing.
I could go on and on…
But I won’t.
The point is that we both resolved to do something important this week. Brian decided it was time for him to do something about his lead foot. Like promptly pay the $108 stupid tax and let me drive from now until forever and ever. Amen.
And I resolved to do something about my lead mouth. Like slow it down. Or just stop it altogether from time to time.
And all the people said, “AMEN!”
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I was pulled over about a year ago on the highway for speeding on my way to church… With my 5 year old in the car…
But it was totally unfair, because he got me for 9 mph over the speed limit. What happened to “9 you’re fine, 10 you’re mine?”
Of course it was Memorial Day weekend and the officer told me, “I want to let you go with just a warning, but since it’s a holiday weekend my superior said I can’t.”
And I do not have cruise in my car. But I’m thinking it may be worth the investment considering I’ve had roughly 3 or 4 speeding tickets and probably 3 or 4 speed warnings… LOL
SarahBourneSarah, you and my husband couldn’t afford to be married to each other! I think the “9 you’re fine” rule was before sequestration. 😉
My husband drives a little bit UNDER the speed limit on the freeway, which annoys me to no end. If anyone is going to get a speeding ticket in our family, it will be me. So far, so good.
Oh, and I heard it was a 10% rule; i.e., you can get away with 44 in a 40 mph zone, 77 in a 70 mph zone. Time will tell.
Dyanne Your husband is probably the one right behind my dad on the interstate. I don’t know what it is about slow drives that makes them think they belong in the fast lane. 🙂
Katy,
I prefer to think of these expenses, not as a stupid tax, but rather as “eduactional” expenses. It just takes more dollars to educate some people. 🙂
Dad
@GMan Brian really liked your comment, daddy. 🙂
Cops in Kansas don’t play! I was used to driving THE SPEED LIMIT in Kansas, because they would jump on you faster than a chicken on a junebug for doing like 6 miles over the limit. When we moved to Atlanta from Kansas, I remember driving 56 or so on I-285 and getting honked at, flipped off, and almost flipped over by the draft from 18 wheelers. You can seriously pass cops going 15 miles or so over the limit here, and they practically tip their hat at you. Also, is it just me, or have they changed their rule in Kansas to the person merging or turning onto the street has the right of way? People pulled out in front of us all the time! And we would see them doing it to other people who would happily just slam on their brakes or slow down even, in preparation. Right after we moved here, we realized we both had a bad habit of slamming on our brakes at intersections. Anyway…we both got at least 2 tickets in Kansas…so that’s at least 4 during the 3 years we lived there, and we’ve now lived in Georgia 7, and neither one of us has been pulled over even. So, at least your training there will yield good results if you ever live here again!
You’re telling me, girl! I’ve never seen more diligent speed-checking. I guess there aren’t enough drug dealers around here to keep them busy.
And, I have to say, while I miss Atlanta and my family…I LOATHE that traffic. I lived in the country in England long enough that I’m now terrified to drive on the interstate there. WHICH REMINDS ME! I had a dream last night that I pulled out onto the wrong side of the road (like I used to do when I’d visit the States when we were in the UK). That was a fun dream.
We should just get together for coffee or something. Seriously.
Funny post. Breaking the LAW on the way to church? Tisk Tisk! Isn’t it funny how the $108 stupid tax is somehow worth it? You got a good blog post out of the deal. You should be THANKING your husband for his infraction of the speed limit. Yeah, that’s it.
Just found your blog from Anna’s my life and kids. You are so funny. I can totally relate to this husband speeding thing. Although I never fail to mention that I’ve never received a speeding ticket in my life. Glad I stopped by and I’m going to start following you via FB so I don’t miss anything.